To the parents of 2020,

I know… I know. Overwhelmed is an understatement for all that is facing you. This isn’t just the opposite of what you had planned; it is life-altering. I know you are wondering where I am. I know you are wondering how I could have possibly blessed you with that job and then asked you to homeschool your kids at the same time.

The truth is this – I am doing so much more than you see. It’s bigger than you can think and more grand than you can imagine. I am working on national levels, while still paying attention to each individual son and daughter’s need. Your need.

I do not take lightly all that this year has brought for you. The very real fear, the tangible changes in your schedule that have required such patience and flexibility. This is so much more than a teachable lesson. I am gracefully allowing this season to reshape you. I know it feels cruel and as if you may be ignored. Please trust Me; it is the exact opposite. It feels as if I couldn’t possibly know or care about all of the details of your situation right now. I do. I do not dismiss them nor ignore them.

In the most loving way possible, don’t forget something. Those babies who have grown into people? They aren’t yours. I have entrusted them to you for a short time, but they are My sons and My daughters. I know what’s best for them. And right now? Believe it or not, what’s best for them is you.

This coming fall is less about who or where they learn from and more about who you are learning from. Are you taking your cues from the world around you, or are you settling deep into the secret place to hear from Me?

I am your Father, your Savior, your Friend. But don’t forget one of My other valuable attributes: I am your Teacher. Yes, I am almighty and omnipotent. I know all things. But I also know exactly what you need to learn and how you need to learn it. And I will help you do the same for your children. David said it best when He listened to me in Psalm 32:8-9:

“I will stay close to you, instructing you along the pathway for your life.

I will advise you along the way and lead you forth with my eyes as your guide.

So don’t make it difficult; don’t be stubborn when I take you where you’ve not been before.

Don’t make you tug you and pull you along. Just come with me!“

Because I love you, I will ask you plainly. When you look back on this time, what do you want to see? Do you want to fight and question and struggle? Or do you want to trust Me to guide you just as I always have?

I am under no assumptions that this is easy. But My yoke is. Trade in your heaviness for what I offer you: peace, joy, and contentment. I never promised you that you wouldn’t be burdened. But I do promise that if you come to Me, you will find rest. Rest for your weary mind and your tired body.

When all else feels uncertain, fix your eyes on Me. I am certain. I am steadfast and unchanging. While the world spins in circles with fear and unanswered questions, I remain seated on My throne with my ears listening for your cries.

It’s okay that it’s hard and even a little bit scary. I will never hold against you the implications and the weight of your reality. But I am asking you for your own peace to trust Me with everything you face ahead of you. Surrender to me the big, open questions of how you’ll get it all done. Remember, it’s in your weakness that My strength is made perfect. Release your fight for strength and stability and let Me be both for you. I am a practical God and a loving Teacher. I am with you every single step of the way, if You’ll allow me along.

Love,

The Lord, your Teacher

“Are you weary, carrying a heavy burden? Then come to Me. I will refresh your life, for I am your oasis. Simply join your life with Mine. Learn My ways and you’ll discover that I’m gentle, humble, easy to please. You will find refreshment and rest in Me. For all that I require of you will be pleasant and easy to bear.”

[Matthew 11:28-30 TPT]

Dear friends, I am now a #dogmom. Please, please look at this little baby and tell me you’ve seen something cuter in your life. YOU HAVEN’T.

I have had two babies and am now three days into a puppy. Yes, it’s like reverting back to a newborn… sort of. I did not carry this puppy in my body for nine months and go through surgery to bring him into the world. We paid another woman to raise him for the first nine weeks of his life, and then picked him up! So I can handle this little teddy bear.

I began wondering what, truly, made raising babies or puppies so tough. Yes, they are exhausting and you sacrifice sleep. Yes, they whine or cry and you’re not always sure what they want. But, honestly, I think the hardest part is learning how to teach them to become the type of people or dogs we want to be around for the rest of their lives. Keeping them alive isn’t the issue. Keeping them alive is exhausting for sure, but there’s so much more.

It is so wild to me that God is our Father. There is so much in the Bible that He teaches us through the idea of parenting that is so relatable.

“My child, don’t underestimate the value of the disciple and training He has to correct you. For the Lord’s training of your life is the evidence of His faithful love. And when He draws you to Himself, it proves you are His delightful child.” [Hebrews 12:5-6 TPT]

Let’s be real. What does this look like in our lives with God? Most of the time it looks like the word, “No.” If you’ve ever raised a baby or a puppy, you know this is something that you’ve had to teach them over and over. You aren’t stopping them from chewing on cords or going near the stairs to be a bully or a killjoy. You are keeping them from stepping into harm’s way. You are teaching them how to be wise. You are not giving them everything they always want so they grow to be well-rounded and grateful.

Our God is not a dictator and He’s not a mean Dad. I know… I know right now it feels like maybe He’s a little distant. Or maybe for you, it feels like He’s been breathing down your neck, slamming His fist down in punishment for all you’ve done wrong.

It feels like a lack of love, but it is the complete opposite.

“Fully embrace God’s correction as part of your training, for He is doing what any loving Father does for His children. For who has ever heard of a child who never had to be corrected? We all should welcome God’s discipline as the validation of authentic sonship.” [Hebrews 12:7-8 TPT]

Too often we breeze past the weight that is carried by our title: child of God. This verse is telling us that the discipline; the training that God gives us is in fact proof of His nearness. Children who grow up without any discipline often resent that part of their childhood; it never taught them how to truly be successful. The truth is that real discipline shows more love than anger. True correction shows care and intimacy. Boundaries, guidelines and restrictions from our Father are only ever out of love.

We are so much more like our children than we realize. Our little kids can’t understand why we say no, or why we ask them to do something that makes no sense to them in the moment. But we ask them to trust us, and hopefully, they do.

Your Father is asking the same of you. When you can’t see the outcome, or even the purpose in why He said no or why He drew that boundary for you – the question isn’t why. The question is: do you trust Him? This is always the question. Do you trust that He is for you even if it may look like He’s ignored you? Do you trust that His answer, whether seemingly negative or distant, is actually what’s best? You may have no trouble believing that His ways are higher and His thoughts are not like ours. But do you believe that His ways and His thoughts are consistently for your good?

The next time you question God’s motive or intention, ask yourself if you’ve ever asked a little child to trust you even when they couldn’t understand. God’s wisdom and love for us cannot even be compared with our wisdom and love for the little ones we are raising.

 

“If you, imperfect as you are, know how to lovingly take care of your children and give them what’s best, how much more ready is your Heavenly Father to give wonderful gifts to those who ask Him?” [Matthew 7:11 TPT]

It’s happening again… can you feel it?

The heavy, unnamed tension.

Maybe it’s because I’m a parent with young kids. Maybe it’s because the school supplies are back out at Target and seeing the backpacks make me want to cry. My youngest is heading to kindergarten this year. I figured I’d probably be emotional about this milestone in our lives, but I had anticipated it being for a different, more positive reason.

I know, I know. Truly, the tension and the madness has been steamrolling through 2020. It’s not like it’s ever really left. But I’ve experienced it all in waves. Have you? Anxiety, rest, anger, peace, apathy, joy, uncertainty. Up. Down. Over. Up. Down.

What is that we’re even hoping for right now?

A cure? A law? An answer?

Whether on a national or personal level: we’re searching and longing for breakthrough. Breakthrough: a sudden, dramatic, and important discovery or development. Everything else is coming at us with no warning, right? Can’t the answers come that way, too?

We are waiting for an end. A resolution. An answer to at least some of the questions. Forget normal – just some sort of homeostasis or stability. But the truth is this:

There is no breakthrough without tension; no saving without needing to be rescued. You find no happy ending without a messy middle.

The strength you are longing for only comes through weakness. Not the pretty kind, either. The desperate kind of weakness. The most valuable attributes we’re all longing to become only arrive through refining. Burning away. Something that is within you now simply cannot stay.

The greatest breakthrough in all of history revolves around the most painful moment of suffering. An unjust, completely unmerited suffering.

It has never been, and will never be God’s intent for you to suffer. Never. But it is always His intent to burn away what was never intended to be a part of your identity. It was always His intent to redeem what has become broken.

Even while you question and pout and stop believing. As you punch and yell like a toddler unable to verbalize your huge emotions. He endures your lack of trust and your turning away of His perfect love. He endures our abuse and neglect over and over, all the while with open arms.

I am not here to convince you to appreciate the in-between, even though I’m convinced we could learn a little bit there. I’m not here to persuade you to learn how to be present or to find joy through your pain. All of this is absolutely a part of God’s plan for redemption for you – but only He can convince you of that. I am here to persuade you of one role you have right now as sons and daughters of God who feel exhausted and unsure. Continue returning.

Return back to Him after you neglect His love and His guidance.

Return back to Him after you abuse His patience and His mercy.

Return back to Him, even if you feel covered in shame at what you ran to instead.

Daily. Hourly. Maybe every ninety seconds if you have to. We can’t understand His heart for injustice if we don’t first recieve His forgiveness . We can’t trust His heart for healing if we don’t first accept His love.

True breakthrough and healing can only come from the Source. Our choices are to simply survive while we wait; or we can choose the beautiful moments in the the middle, and run to the Father, who has all that we need.

 

“Let my passion for life be restored, tasting joy in every breakthrough you bring to me. Hold me close to you with a willing spirit that obeys whatever you say.”

[Psalm 51:12 TPT]

 

Well, hey there.

I haven’t published a blog in almost a month! The truth is, this is a space that I committed to three years ago. I kept myself accountable to continue writing and seeking God’s voice. And like every other story of 2020: well, it just all went down, didn’t it? Forget the fact that our normal routine went out the window. I was immediately given several roles that I never signed up for; one of them being teacher. Friends, this is just not a gifting from the Lord for me. My poor little children. Well, I think they graduated pre-k and kindergarten, but they sure didn’t learn anything extra. I went from having several recently acquired hours alone to my entire family all together at home twenty-four hours a day.

The routine and the expectations I had for myself simply couldn’t all be reached. Something had to give. And for a few weeks, it was my attention to this blog.

I don’t need to explain to you that the past several months have been an adjustment. And the wild part is that it’s not over. We are still learning what this is supposed to look like; what we are supposed to learn and how we are are supposed to grow.

Why does it matter to you that I haven’t written here in a month? I am under no assumptions that you are lost without my words to read. But as the days all rolled into each other and I found I just couldn’t get it all done – I wondered if you’ve been walking through the same kind of experience.

I wonder if you’ve put pressure on yourself to keep all of the same responsibilities you held before a global pandemic hit.

I wonder if you’ve lost a little bit of yourself because of the inability to lean into flexibility and space that you never asked for.

What if God is using this time to teach us more than to readjust our priorities and our schedules? I believe God is teaching us about flexibility.

True contentment comes from adaptability and flexibility. Paul addresses this secret here:

“I know what it means to lack, and I know what it means to experience overwhelming abundance. For I’m trained in the secret of overcoming all things, whether in fullness or in hunger. And I find that the strength of Christ’s explosive power infuses me to conquer every difficulty.” [Philippians 4:12-13]

The secret of overcoming is not necessarily gratitude or a good outlook. It is Christ’s power. Somewhere along the way, we’ve believed the lie that we should be able to remain the same when crisis comes. Somehow, we’ve been told that we must remain strong within ourselves when everything around us is falling apart. These lies only lead us to one thing: a deeper unraveling.

The only truth that stretches our contentment, our flexibility to not only endure difficulties but overcome them, is the power of God.

He meets us in our weaknesses with perfect strength.

He graciously fills in the places we lack with abundance.

He has never asked us to overcome uncertainty with vision for the future. We overcome through His power alone.

I’ve got to ask you: Is there anything during this season that you have gripped so tightly, that God may be asking you to release? Is it something in your schedule, a relationship, a lie you’ve believed about yourself? We all want to grow through this season, don’t we? I haven’t encountered anyone who doesn’t want to learn and become a more beautiful version of themselves on the other side of hardships But we cannot become new if we stay stuck in the old.

Flexibility and adaptability require pushing, stretching, and tension. It’s new and uncomfortable and it never looks the same.

What do you need to let go of so that God can walk you into His promises for your life?

It’s so much more than simply shifting our priorities. We’ve got to get back to the authority of our one priority: the love and the will of God. Everything else we should or shouldn’t do falls under His authority. Everything we need right now, and everything that needs to fall away in order to lighten the load is within the palm of His hand.

In the stretching and the tension, we find growth and increase. Are we willing to say yes to Him, and willing to release anything He asks of us?

I know this is tough. I’m in it with you. I’d love to pray together as we ask God what this looks like.

Jesus, 

This period of our life is challenging us in ways we never asked for. We trust that Your plans for us are good. We trust that You always know what is best. Help us to believe fully that Your ways are higher than ours. God, if there is anything in our life that we are holding onto more tightly than we are holding onto You, would you show us? Right now, we give you permission to search our hearts and lead us in the way of everlasting – the way that leads to You. Set our feet to look to You. We know that nothing else, No one else gives us what we need. We declare that we are weak, and You are strong. Help us to learn, to grow, and to be willing to step into something new, knowing You lead us the entire way.

Amen.

 

We’ve hit a monumental moment in the year 2020. We are officially halfway through the year. 2020; the year where everything blew up. We’ve heard a lot of different opinions on this, haven’t we? The memes of 2020 simultaneously make me want to laugh and cry.

A global pandemic, injustice, national riots, murder hornets!? Is this real life? We could all lean into the cyclical rhetoric of “It just isn’t my year… again.”

I’m not here to try to create anything that hasn’t been said before. I’m here to pose a question of perspective. The truth is this: we haven’t run out of time. Hope is not lost, despite what everything on your phone tells you. 20/20 is the term used for perfect vision. What if 2020 isn’t the worst year of all time? What if we allowed 2020 to be the year we saw clearly? To see clearly what matters. To see clearly where you have been silent. To have vision for what you may need to say yes or no to. Yes, change is happening on a national level. Yes, you can absolutely affect change, and your voice matters. But the truth is that unless you allow Jesus to do the hard, heart-changing work on the inside of you, you will remain the same.

If counseling has taught me anything, it’s this: maybe it’s not all bad. Maybe just because things are hard doesn’t mean that they’re wrong. Maybe we live in a world that is broken, and just like Jesus said, we would experience and watch brokenness. Jesus gave us a million examples of what it looks like for things to get worse before they get better.

In order to grow something new, you must dig up the old. It’s gotta get a little messy. Dirty. There is hard work involved. What if, through the dirt and through the mess, we allowed this year not simply to make us better; but to make our vision clear?

The question always remains: “So where does this leave me?”

Thankfully, God’s word has a beautiful answer for us when it all feels too big.

“In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God’s will.” [Romans 8:26-27]

This truth addresses our lack of knowledge and wisdom for what is right. It speaks to our heartbreak and our questions. God’s will often feels like one massive, mysterious and unsearchable answer that we’ll never know. But this verse makes it clear: His Spirit, who lives in you, prays for you with all of the knowledge of the will of God. 

It’s all closer than you think. Clarity, guidance, wisdom. I believe that our hearts have lied to us and molded us to believe that somewhere along the line, our God plays games with our lives. The doubt in us believes that, sure, He has good things for us; but He is present in our lives with one hand behind His back. It just isn’t true. Scroll back up two paragraphs and read the truth over again. The truth is that God “...anointed us, set His seal of ownership on us, and put His Spirit in our hearts as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.” [2 Corinthians 2:22]

God didn’t have to do this, you know. It is only for our benefit that the Almighty God sealed His Spirit in each one of us; to guide us, and pray for us in a way that lines up with God’s will for our lives.

If you have felt discouraged over these past few months, take some time now to sit. The living, breathing Spirit of God has been sealed within you as a promise. He knows you, and He knows God. There is no need to fear what is coming or live in shame about what was. He has searched you, He knows you, and you have complete access to all that He is. This is how we change the world.

Pray. Use your voice. Act. But in the end, none of it was meant to be carried by you. The pain, the injustice, the heartbreak of the world was never meant to be carried by you. Your role is to pick up the broken pieces, turn around, and hand them to the Healer.

Can I be honest?

I’ve agonized for a few days now over the right thing to post. Words feel a little scary right now. I’m tempted to tell you that this past week has felt heavy for me; but I’m far too aware that for so many of my friends , they’ve lived with this kind of racial heaviness their whole lives. For that, I am so, so sorry.

Truly, what is going on in the world right now is not new. Heartbreak, loss, injustice and suffering are not a result of the year 2020. Just because it hasn’t always been accessible at the touch of our thumbs doesn’t mean it is just now occurring. But I’ve learned that maybe even if I don’t have the exact right words – imperfection is better than silence.

I don’t want to spit out tweet-able phrases. I’m afraid that most of the time, we’ve reduced our education and our opinions to be based off of a quote or a meme someone else has shared and sounds like it could be right. I want the Truth. Anyone else?

It feels like the world is on fire. In some cities, this is a current reality. People are still dying from a virus. Our country feels more divided than I’ve experienced in my lifetime. I made the mistake of reading some comments on some well-known Instagram accounts I follow last night. It brought me to tears. Much of the Church is misrepresenting the heart of God.

So, God – where are you?

I assure you, He is here.

“The nations rage, the kingdoms totter; He utters His voice, the earth melts.

The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress.”

[Psalm 46:6-7]

He is here, and He knows.

He knows that you’re a black person in America right now, struggling to find your voice or wondering if it even matters at all.

He knows you are a white Christian, longing for peace and justice but feeling lost with how to go about it.

He knows you’re still walking around in fear about your health and the state of the world.

Although the world feels like it’s burning and covered in masks and signs, your presence, your purpose and your pain have not for one moment escaped God’s notice.

What’s happening in our country right now only confirms what God’s been trying to reinforce all along: love. Love your neighbor. You have no idea what they’ve been through. The truth is, if you’ve never experienced the death of a family member – you listen to those who have. If you’ve never experienced abuse – you listen to those who have. You are not the authority on things you’ve never experienced.God has called us to choose the side of Truth, and to listen to those who have authority over this particular pain called racism.

Here is where we’ve mixed up the truth and the character of God: He has never been either/or.

He is not love OR justice.

He is not peace OR truth.

He is not righteous OR forgiving.

He is all of it. Holy. Righteous. Peace. Joy. Just. Forgiving.

Therefore, I can be loving and fight for justice. I can pray for peace and stand up against abuse.

For those of us in the world right now who are broken and wounded: He is standing with you.

And for those of us who feel just a little bit stuck: our response to the pain of the world and our brothers and sisters should be the same of every other confusing or painful experience:

Search me, God, and know my heart;

test me and know my anxious thoughts.

See if there is any offensive way in me,

and lead me in the way everlasting.

[Psalm 139:23-24]

Not one time in the Bible does God implore us to point fingers or assign blame. God is here. He is present. The question is: are we?

Our God is an advocate, a counselor, and a listener. Are we?

Our God is a friend; patient and loving. Are we?

The reality is that the perfect blog post or the most outspoken words will not change the world. The world changes when we look in the mirror and give permission to our Creator to be honest with us. Have we been too silent? Have we been too loud? There is no one right way around this. We must speak up and we must seek God in the silent places. We must do the hidden, hard work and we must let it begin with allowing God to be truthful with what He sees in our own hearts.

With an open heart to love our neighbors as ourselves – now, that’s a new beginning and a road paved toward healing.

 

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’               There is no commandment greater than these.”

[Mark 12:30-31]

This spring has been an interesting one at my house. My sweet little girl is suddenly terrified of bugs. I mean it. She refuses to go outside. Her whole body tenses up, she freezes and stares at the flying creatures. It doesn’t help that our house has carpenter bees. Those suckers are big and intimidating. Apparently they don’t sting you, but they are still a big fat bummer.

We try just about every day to sit with her outside. She literally flails and cries to go back inside. It’s terrible. I snapped a picture of one of our most recent attempts to calm her down outside. The bees were buzzing around our roof, and my husband held her face to try to avert her eyes and focus on him. He’s a really good dad. He was so patient and calm. It didn’t work, by the way. She ended up back inside.

The world around us has begun feeling this way to me lately. I feel safe in my home, but stepping outside to a grocery store or a doctors office reminds me that fear is everywhere. The air around us feels heavy. The division is thick. It’s tangible. Depending on your views and your personality, you may have different reactions to all that’s happening around you.

Traumatic videos of racism and murder are swirling with arguments and fear.

Each state changes its opinions and its rules daily. What we knew about how to be healthy yesterday may not be true today.

The open-ended questions about the future are exhausting. Will my kids go back to school? Will we ever grocery shop without a mask? What is the truth about any of it, anyway?

I’ve found myself exhausted for seemingly no reason.

Here is the truth: the threats are real. Just like the bees swarming at my roof, it doesn’t help any of us to deny the reality. But if we become solely focused on the bad or what might happen – we will be paralyzed and afraid to step outside.

God’s response to our current situation sounds watered-down and general, but it is the opposite. If you’re wondering what side to stand on, what to fight for, or what you’re called to right now – it’s love.

Love is not general and it’s not passive.

“Love never brings fear, for fear is related to punishment. But love’s perfection drives out the fear of punishment from our hearts. Whoever walks consistently afraid of punishment has not reached love’s perfection. Our love for others is our grateful response to the love God first demonstrated us.” [1 John 18-19]

To be loved by God is to love others.

Love by making your family your priority.

Love by standing up for racism and injustice. Love takes a side when it comes to abuse and hate.

Love by assuming the best in everyone when they might be at their worst.

Love by seeing that person who disagrees with you as a fellow human being.

Love by accepting grace for yourself when you feel paralyzed.

Love by stepping outside and not giving into fear.

Love by giving something you have to someone else.

Love by smiling at strangers even on your bad day.

Love by being patient in the lines that grow longer and longer at grocery stores and fast food restaurants.

Love by saying, “I’m sorry” when you get it wrong.

Love because He loved us first.

We have so many choices at this moment in time. So. Many. Decisions. Check in on the news if you must, but like Olivia, we have to face our fears and step outside. The threats are real. But we are loved beyond what we’re afraid of. Gauge your responses and your heart position with one question: “Am I responding with the same love I’ve been given?” This requires pause. This requires wisdom. And it pushes us to seek the strength of the One who is love Himself.

Our God is not afraid. His heart breaks for every loss and every hurt, but He is never unsure or caught off guard. We are loved beyond our fears and our uncertainties.

You are loved beyond your fears. And so are they.

“For He has given us this command: whoever loves God must also demonstrate love to others.” [1 John 4:21]

Let’s talk about what’s really been going on during quarantine, okay?

We’re all eating. Like, a lot. We’re baking, because, what else is there to do? We’re trying out new recipes in my house. We’re making banana bread and chocolate chip cookies. We’re up late and creating new late night snacks. Is it because we’re bored? Is it because we’re cooped up in the house?

I don’t know the answer; I just know the reality of life right now. And if you’re anything like me, you’re vacillating between: “YOLO! Life is so weird right now, I will absolutely indulge and allow myself these extra things for some comfort” and, “Literally, this is the perfect time to take care of my health and get in shape; what the heck is wrong with me?!”

Guys. If you google “COVID-15”, you will literally find numerous of articles about how to maintain a healthy weight during a global pandemic. Seriously, I just tried it and I found at least five. We’re all joking about our eating habits right now, but here’s what I know. Behind every joke is an element of truth. Behind every meme share about the COVID-15 is most likely a woman who’s cried about not being able to button her jeans. On just about every Zoom Meeting, there’s an insecure, anxious soul who spent too long getting ready for fear of hating the way they looked on a screen. There is literally an option on Zoom called “Touch Up My Appearance.” Have I wanted to use it? Heck yes. Am I too forgetful to ever find out if it works? Also, yes.

This post is not about loving ourselves. I’m not here to try to convince you that you are beautiful and you are enough; although, you are.

I’m here to wonder and question with you how God feels about our image of ourselves.

The world tells us daily to push through. To take control over our bodies’ needs and crush our goals. To ignore what we need in order to get what we want.

Whatever happened to listening to our bodies? Not using pain or discomfort as a cop-out to be lazy, but allowing our bodies and minds to be connected. God didn’t create us with separate parts to function on their own.

If what the Bible says is true, then the Holy Spirit lives in us, right? Here’s how Paul so gently puts it…

“Have you forgotten that your body is now the sacred temple of the Spirit of Holiness, who lives in you? You don’t belong to yourself any longer, for the gift of God, the Holy Spirit lives inside your sanctuary.” [1 Corinthians 6:19]

In the spirit of honesty if you weren’t aware, this verse is referring to sexual sin. But the truth is this: God cares about how we view the body He gave us because He lives there, too. 

I’m going to go so far as to say that if the Holy Spirit’s sanctuary is our earthy body, it matters how we speak to ourselves about our bodies. Yes, it matters that we take care of ourselves. We should be active and eating well to care for this sacred temple.

But we are doing the grace of Jesus Christ a disservice when we hold ourselves to an impossible body image standard. I feel it. I get it. I do my best to exercise for my physical and mental health – but my frustration and mood can often be so dependent upon my discontentment with how my clothes fit or my appearance in a photo on Instagram. I’ve gained more weight than I’m comfortable with in the past year, and there are times it consumes me. And I’m guessing it’s happened to you, too.

It’s real, y’all. It’s being magnified right now as our only contact with the outside world is through screens. The problem is, it’s not just about what the mirror shows us anymore. It isn’t just about how we see ourselves. It’s how we see ourselves through everyone else’s eyes. We’re viewing ourselves through a virtual mirror that is filtered and cropped and magnified. Our faces are literally little squares of comparison on every Zoom meeting.

Our issues with weight and body image are not trivial to God. When I say He wants to be involved in every piece of our lives, I mean it.

We can’t extend ourselves grace here. We can only accept it. If we try to create grace and self-love, we’ll fail and disappoint ourselves over and over. Our grace is conditional. Self-love is limited. But the One who is love is eternal and unconditional. God is the Source of grace and love and never with conditions or limitations.

So yeah, take care of your body and your mind. Eat healthy, exercise, get active. But lay on the couch and eat ice cream or donuts, too. This life is too precious to limit ourselves to an either/or lifestyle. Treat yourself kindly and accept the perfect love that has already been bought for you. Grace is not yours to create or control. Grace has already been fully and perfectly formed, and all you need to do now is accept it fully for yourself.

 

“Beloved friends, what should be our proper response to God’s marvelous mercies? I encourage you to surrender yourselves to God to be His sacred, living sacrifices. And live in holiness, experiencing all that delights His heart. For this becomes your genuine expression of worship. Stop imitating the ideals and the opinions of the culture around you, but be inwardly transformed by the Holy Spirit through a total reformation of how you think. This will empower you to discern God’s will as you live a beautiful life, satisfying and perfect in His eyes.“

[Romans 12:1-2]

 

A dear friend of mine is experiencing her first Mother’s Day without her mom, after living without her for only a few short weeks; all during a global pandemic. There are no words for this kind of loss. The reality is there are probably more of us who feel loss on Mother’s Day than those of us who don’t. It’s time we recognize how we are all feeling on this day.

When we boil it down, what makes a good mom, anyway? What is this mysterious thing that we are either grateful for or we are lacking?

Here is how you described what a mother is:

Selfless. Caring. Generous. Supportive. Resilient. Strong. Nurturing. Compassionate. Fun. Inspirational. Talented. Dedicated.

If for some reason, you are secretly Superwoman and possess all of these qualities, do me a favor and just keep it to yourself. Don’t make the rest of us mortals feel bad. Let’s be real. None of us have it all. Some days, it feels like a struggle to possess any of these qualities at all.  The perfect woman doesn’t exist. None of us contain all of these beautiful traits, and it’s for a reason. God has strategically and wonderfully placed just enough of Himself within each woman to point others to back to Him.

Women are special to God. I believe it so deep down. He chooses no favorites. He is not more proud of a mother with seven kids than a single forty-something. Let’s not forget: the women that the Almighty God chose to be a part of the bloodline of Jesus were complete wrecks. They were young, dirty, manipulative, unwise, and unexperienced. But each of them had one thing in common. Their legacy led to the birth of the Messiah: the Savior of the world.

It matters to me so much where you find yourself today. My heart is longing to know if you feel alone or discouraged. Women of all kinds, no matter where you are, please hear me: you have a purpose. Whether you are raising children or not, your life can leave a legacy. I’d love to tell you that God has made you all of those beautiful words above. Selfless, strong, resilient, supportive. The real truth is that in the end, you aren’t supposed to be everything to everyone else. Your most valuable role is to point others to Him; the only One who has all of the qualities you long for within yourself. When you fail, He steps in. When You fall, He shows the world how graciously He picks you back up. When you’re weak, He is strongest.

So if you aren’t sure what to make of today, here is your permission for wherever you find yourself:

If you have a great mom, mother-in-law, stepmom, or grandma – celebrate her. Love her. Thank God for her. I know I am beyond blessed to have incredible women in my life.

If you are a mom of young kids, chances are your day might look chaotic and not necessarily how you’d plan for it to go. In between the messiness, arguments or diapers, be present today. Revel in the trust that God has in you to raise His kids. What a deep honor.

If you are a mom with grown children, resist the urge to think that your best days are behind you. Push aside any thoughts that may lead you to shame or guilt about how you may have parented them. They have always belonged to God before they belonged to you. Accept your inheritance and your identity as His daughter today and be proud.

If you are longing to be a mom: let the loss settle today. You are not doing anything wrong. Question. Cry. Then remember: God has still appointed you to do His work as a woman. You have purpose. You have a future. He is not done with you. You are not alone.

If you are a single woman with no children, let yourself feel whatever it is you need to feel. If you’re disappointed, be disappointed. If you are content, let contentment wrap you up. Feel it all, and then take a step deeper. Be the mentor, the mother figure in someone else’s life. Speak out to someone else that you love them and believe in them. Watch it grow you. You are so valuable.

If you’ve lost your mom, this is your permission to grieve again. The woman who raised you is no longer present to support you. You have experienced something deep, and you are not alone. He is your Healer and your Comfort when nothing else can ease that ache.

And if today hurts because you have never experienced a true mother’s love: grieve. Don’t run from the loss that today holds for you. Allow yourself to feel what was, and then grab onto hope. This kind of loss was never God’s intention for your life. Feel the ache, and then reach deeper. Who filled in those roles for you? Maybe it was your dad, a teacher, an aunt, or a mentor. Reach out and thank them. Celebrate them today. Let God fill every single empty space.

Today and every day, you are valuable. You are cherished. You are loved. You have purpose. I am grateful for you.

Your life is a part of the incredible story God has weaved together before the foundation of the world. Let Him script it out for you in His own way.

 

“It’s in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Long before we heard of Christ and got our hopes up, He had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall purpose He is working out in everything and everyone.”

[Ephesians 1:11-12 msg]

 

 

 

What I’d like to tell you from the get-go is that this shouldn’t even be considered a blog post. Because, honestly? I have nothing to share with you.

The reality is that overnight, I was given way more roles than I signed up for. The truth is that many of the responsibilities that I agreed to or even felt called to – are now feeling draining and at times lifeless. I am now no longer just a mom. I’m also a teacher. Y’all. This is just absolutely not my gifting. Jesus has blessed me with many things. Teaching is just not one of them. If I ever doubted this before in my life, I know now it to be a fact.

My brain and my body are exhausted in new ways that feel confusing.

The normal tools that I have always used as an outlet simply aren’t working for me anymore. Writing has always been my safe place and it’s become something that feels like it’s more of a taker than a giver.

Yet here I am – writing. Here I am, telling you that if whatever your normal stress reliever is isn’t working – it is okay. If you love people and you miss people but also – you have no room for people – it’s okay.

If you’re not feeling like much of a rockstar of anything right now… it’s more than okay. I think it’s most likely the only way to be right now.

In case you have forgotten, as I often have:

Jesus is so more concerned about who you are becoming than how well you are doing.

This time in history is about more than simply learning how to rest or being thankful for what we have. It’s not merely about re-evaluating our busy schedules or re-thinking our priorities.

At the end of the day, when nothing makes sense and you have nothing to give, He remains steadfast. We are not going to survive because of an increase in strength or peace. We survive and we live because of mercy. Because of His great and undeserved compassion, we live and breathe.

Mercy embodies the heart of God over us, His children.

Mercy reminds us that:

We were chosen before the creation of the world. Undeservedly and wildly.

We were made in the image of the Almighty God. Beautifully and thoughtfully formed with unmerited love.

We are loved in spite of and far beyond our best accomplishments.

He has poured out compassion.

Unreserved. Uncontained. Unrequited.

This is the only truth that will get us through. That Jesus Christ reached down to pick us up and place us on a rock so that we don’t have to work to succeed on our own.

If you feel like you’re failing over and over, or if the things that normally bring you joy feel like dread, just stop. Jesus is the ultimate Creator. He has something new for you that may look nothing like your past seasons. Let Him walk with you, teach you how to take these new steps.

You are not supposed to know how to do this right. But you have a Father who is more than one step ahead. In fact, He is behind, beside, and before you. You are beautifully and fiercely surrounded.

So yeah, I’ve got nothing. And in His eyes, it’s exactly enough.

“My grace is always more than enough for you, and my power finds its full expression through your weakness.” [2 Corinthians 12:9]